Very tired..
Maybe when i am feeling better, i will write more..
So tired!!!!
23 October 2007
21 October 2007
How many Sundays' left before term ends?
It's sunday again! Wasn't i just saying that i had a busy weekend ahead? oh no.. am always rushing for time!
Btw, it's mostly cloudy in singapore, with a temperature of 27 degree celcius. haha.. i've installed a time-sensitive weather toolbar on my browser.. hmm..
Anw, spent my day ytdy writing 2 or 3 reports. still just on the 2nd page of my chi lit report and it's not easy to write man! at least now one of my group members from translation cared to do the work and she pm me in msn and asked about it. but still, i am going to do the compilation and stuff while she informed the others. but watever, everyone in the group had wrote something to me that i can start to edit, except that rainfall. yea. miss rainfall. always late. but i dun care. i compile it still. so another stuff's cleared.
Tml bringing those jap kids to tour. ahh! i din't practice anything lei. later gotta read thru my grammar stuff. if not forget how to tok in jap, how? luckily we're doing this in a big group of 5 members to 3 kids. hmm..
JY (who took jap but oso translation) pm me on msn ytdy. he asked me if the translation report is on the whole essay or just the groups' allocated part. i told him the latter one. and he asked, "you sure?" erm.. i was stunned for awhile. coz i duno how to reply to this kind of question. you ask me, i told u, then u asked, u sure? can i say, "no. not sure. so sorry." maybe is i weird la. haha.. just a simple question i can think too much. but if he doubts me, den why ask me. and he only seemed convinced when i said, "we asked the teacher personally before." hmm..
Went back to facebook. and i found something new and fun out of it. had an account for like 5 months ago, when i think not many ppl knew facebook yet. den al intro to me, so i join, and i think his mexican friend intro to him. found that it's so difficult to use then, that i din want to be bothered with it. went back on fri, and i found it was so fun! many ppl are now using it and it really comes with a lot more features. so much so i started to find friendster boring. oops. but it's fun la. ha.. go try go try. =) i think pam n bro yj will love it too.
ah! tml got piano lesson and tuition again! why so fast!! but i'm looking forward to it. (not inc tuition)
Btw, it's mostly cloudy in singapore, with a temperature of 27 degree celcius. haha.. i've installed a time-sensitive weather toolbar on my browser.. hmm..
Anw, spent my day ytdy writing 2 or 3 reports. still just on the 2nd page of my chi lit report and it's not easy to write man! at least now one of my group members from translation cared to do the work and she pm me in msn and asked about it. but still, i am going to do the compilation and stuff while she informed the others. but watever, everyone in the group had wrote something to me that i can start to edit, except that rainfall. yea. miss rainfall. always late. but i dun care. i compile it still. so another stuff's cleared.
Tml bringing those jap kids to tour. ahh! i din't practice anything lei. later gotta read thru my grammar stuff. if not forget how to tok in jap, how? luckily we're doing this in a big group of 5 members to 3 kids. hmm..
JY (who took jap but oso translation) pm me on msn ytdy. he asked me if the translation report is on the whole essay or just the groups' allocated part. i told him the latter one. and he asked, "you sure?" erm.. i was stunned for awhile. coz i duno how to reply to this kind of question. you ask me, i told u, then u asked, u sure? can i say, "no. not sure. so sorry." maybe is i weird la. haha.. just a simple question i can think too much. but if he doubts me, den why ask me. and he only seemed convinced when i said, "we asked the teacher personally before." hmm..
Went back to facebook. and i found something new and fun out of it. had an account for like 5 months ago, when i think not many ppl knew facebook yet. den al intro to me, so i join, and i think his mexican friend intro to him. found that it's so difficult to use then, that i din want to be bothered with it. went back on fri, and i found it was so fun! many ppl are now using it and it really comes with a lot more features. so much so i started to find friendster boring. oops. but it's fun la. ha.. go try go try. =) i think pam n bro yj will love it too.
ah! tml got piano lesson and tuition again! why so fast!! but i'm looking forward to it. (not inc tuition)
19 October 2007
weekend again
It's weekend again.
Er-hem.. i am feeling better le. Thanks guys. Err.. conclusion is.. i know it's hard to give up on him now, but the process is on-going and sooner or later, i can learn to see him as nothing more than a friend. Anw, i should have learnt this long ago.
"if a guy seldom ask you questions about you, he's not interested in you, (yet)." and.. "most guys can't treat the girl they like as purely friends."
Anw, the world is big out there. I can find someone so much better than him. though the chances are slim la. ha.. not my fate anw.. gotta accept it. Hmm..
=====Case closed=====
Ok, i thought i was free. i thought i can meet up sh(my sis) for dinner today. i thought i can slack around coz my 2 assignments are submitted. But! 2 more cropped up! so last min. after the tutorials.. got the geo practical report to be done. ok, it's an easy report.. hopefully very soon we can get it done and over with.
den for.. translation. walao.. cannot stand my group mates. we're supposed to hand in a report also, discussing about the difficulties that you face when trying to translate a text. and that seemed so easy. so what do my group members do? ask them how they wanna discuss, they went silent. i suggest each of us take up one point. den one of the group member said, "又要？"WTF. yala.. you tell this to teacher la! how can you say such a thing??? then all the other groups stayed back after tutorial to discuss how they wanna go about doing it, but our group, the ‘又要' girl and her friend mumbled "k la den we do by monday, i'm so hungry, let's go'. den all our instructions damn not clear. i dun wish to ask them to do up individually again and suggest the idea of the last person to collate. WTH. sigh.. so let's see. if they can sit back and relax, i think i can too ba. since everything's a group effort. yeah i know there are people like this when they noe there will be ppl who initiate. so they sit and wait. but fk la. wat '又要'? pissed.
~~~
Went to cristofori jus now .. it's been so long.. to prac piano.. i long time nv spend an hr there to prac on the real piano. missed that touch man!! ok so i went on to prac those piano songs.. hmm.. i think my coordination skills are improving.. took lesser time to finish what i had to practise. and i went on to practise 'to zarnakand'.. at least now, i can play this page 'fluently'. LOL.
Busy weekend ahead. Anw, at least something to look forward to. going to bring the jap kids to changi museum and later on bringing them to tour around nus. hmm.. nice.. at least no jap lessons, and can have a nice experience with real native japanese .. =)
Er-hem.. i am feeling better le. Thanks guys. Err.. conclusion is.. i know it's hard to give up on him now, but the process is on-going and sooner or later, i can learn to see him as nothing more than a friend. Anw, i should have learnt this long ago.
"if a guy seldom ask you questions about you, he's not interested in you, (yet)." and.. "most guys can't treat the girl they like as purely friends."
Anw, the world is big out there. I can find someone so much better than him. though the chances are slim la. ha.. not my fate anw.. gotta accept it. Hmm..
=====Case closed=====
Ok, i thought i was free. i thought i can meet up sh(my sis) for dinner today. i thought i can slack around coz my 2 assignments are submitted. But! 2 more cropped up! so last min. after the tutorials.. got the geo practical report to be done. ok, it's an easy report.. hopefully very soon we can get it done and over with.
den for.. translation. walao.. cannot stand my group mates. we're supposed to hand in a report also, discussing about the difficulties that you face when trying to translate a text. and that seemed so easy. so what do my group members do? ask them how they wanna discuss, they went silent. i suggest each of us take up one point. den one of the group member said, "又要？"WTF. yala.. you tell this to teacher la! how can you say such a thing??? then all the other groups stayed back after tutorial to discuss how they wanna go about doing it, but our group, the ‘又要' girl and her friend mumbled "k la den we do by monday, i'm so hungry, let's go'. den all our instructions damn not clear. i dun wish to ask them to do up individually again and suggest the idea of the last person to collate. WTH. sigh.. so let's see. if they can sit back and relax, i think i can too ba. since everything's a group effort. yeah i know there are people like this when they noe there will be ppl who initiate. so they sit and wait. but fk la. wat '又要'? pissed.
~~~
Went to cristofori jus now .. it's been so long.. to prac piano.. i long time nv spend an hr there to prac on the real piano. missed that touch man!! ok so i went on to prac those piano songs.. hmm.. i think my coordination skills are improving.. took lesser time to finish what i had to practise. and i went on to practise 'to zarnakand'.. at least now, i can play this page 'fluently'. LOL.
Busy weekend ahead. Anw, at least something to look forward to. going to bring the jap kids to changi museum and later on bringing them to tour around nus. hmm.. nice.. at least no jap lessons, and can have a nice experience with real native japanese .. =)
17 October 2007
smilez
Ok. i was too pessimistic on the previous post.
Nothing's wrong with me. Please dun worry.
I am back on my heels, and am ready to go.
Nothing's wrong with me. Please dun worry.
I am back on my heels, and am ready to go.
Another taste of life
I don't want my days to be darkened again by this. I took such a long time to find that happiness and cheeriness in me. and it just 'poofed' and gone when i realized a truth yesterday.
It wasn't a happy sem for me. Maybe not seeing him in school again will be a happier choice.
Was tied down by his self-centredness. I don't have the patience to continue coo-ing him. and i realised, without all those efforts i made, our friendship wouldn't have progressed until here. and still, i realised our friendship wasn't platonic.
He said he would never care how others think. But, the thing that happened yesterday, or most probably a week ago, erased this assumption. Or he just want to plainly, indirectly draw a line for me.
There's no point 'hiding' behind of the scene of friendship and enjoying each other's accompany and acting like everything's pure and normal. it's totally one-sided and he didn't mind the one-sidedness when he's on the receiving side.
Not much time left, no more future plans together, we see more dark faces, nothing more to talk.
I may have assumed too much. and i may be too pessimistic, and maybe i was the one who makes things hell lot more complicated. i had said i don't wanna care, and there's nothing btwn us at all, and i wasn't weak and i wouldn't mind if i lose a fren in him. But these are lies to the world n to myself. I realised how there's an inner me which i could not control, and i had thought of exorcism. The devil in me had craved too much.
Hard as i don't wish to admit,
我失恋了。
But it end well. well enough that we hurt nth more than the deepest side of us, and no slight disturbance on the surface.
Had enough of 2007. it's the 2nd time.
It wasn't a happy sem for me. Maybe not seeing him in school again will be a happier choice.
Was tied down by his self-centredness. I don't have the patience to continue coo-ing him. and i realised, without all those efforts i made, our friendship wouldn't have progressed until here. and still, i realised our friendship wasn't platonic.
He said he would never care how others think. But, the thing that happened yesterday, or most probably a week ago, erased this assumption. Or he just want to plainly, indirectly draw a line for me.
There's no point 'hiding' behind of the scene of friendship and enjoying each other's accompany and acting like everything's pure and normal. it's totally one-sided and he didn't mind the one-sidedness when he's on the receiving side.
Not much time left, no more future plans together, we see more dark faces, nothing more to talk.
I may have assumed too much. and i may be too pessimistic, and maybe i was the one who makes things hell lot more complicated. i had said i don't wanna care, and there's nothing btwn us at all, and i wasn't weak and i wouldn't mind if i lose a fren in him. But these are lies to the world n to myself. I realised how there's an inner me which i could not control, and i had thought of exorcism. The devil in me had craved too much.
Hard as i don't wish to admit,
我失恋了。
But it end well. well enough that we hurt nth more than the deepest side of us, and no slight disturbance on the surface.
Had enough of 2007. it's the 2nd time.
15 October 2007
Lyrics - Brilliant Player
I am an irritating fly.
Wasn't invited.
I had made myself so available.
I was always there.
that You took me for granted.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i made my leave, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted my time, you thought i wasted yours.
You're a brilliant player.
When i was cold to you, you gained my attention.
When i was nice, you left it cold.
When things are better for me, you see no other,
You want life the best for you.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i get a life, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted my days, you thought i'll always be there.
You're a brilliant player.
I want an end.
I want a closure.
And that's all i can do to avoid you.
When there's nothing better than a hi I can give,
I was just like an irritating fly to you.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i make my leave, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted everything, you thought i'm going to be here.
You're a brilliant player.
But i can be a better player than you.
Wasn't invited.
I had made myself so available.
I was always there.
that You took me for granted.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i made my leave, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted my time, you thought i wasted yours.
You're a brilliant player.
When i was cold to you, you gained my attention.
When i was nice, you left it cold.
When things are better for me, you see no other,
You want life the best for you.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i get a life, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted my days, you thought i'll always be there.
You're a brilliant player.
I want an end.
I want a closure.
And that's all i can do to avoid you.
When there's nothing better than a hi I can give,
I was just like an irritating fly to you.
You never promised.
You never cared.
When i make my leave, you don't wanna say goodbye.
You wasted everything, you thought i'm going to be here.
You're a brilliant player.
But i can be a better player than you.
比较轻松咯。。
今天过得挺轻松地。
早早到printing lab去print‘to zanarkand'的乐谱、lecture notes等。。上了jap lecture，作了lecture quiz，就和HJ, al跑出来，去lab，然后再和HJ去吃东西。。很喜欢跟HJ在一起，怀念那段year one sem 1到现在的感觉。那时只有我们两个人，不是很熟、但是很click，也很demure。。sem 2，和HJ单独的时间比较少，总是和kel一起，很多搞笑、发疯的回忆。时常加上al,我们四个在一起，一在一起，就是笑不停。kel总是弄HJ笑，我随时参一脚，al就会在一旁很冷静，说‘一点都不好笑！’year2 sem1,和HJ在一起的时间虽然比较少，但我们还是一样，一在一起就无话不谈。和al在一起时，也发现他变得很多话了，什么事都可以讲。
我也发现，和朋友深交，会渐渐忽略了浅交的朋友。得一样、失一样。最后，还是要靠双方面。有缘分成为朋友，也得有努力维持啊。。
吃完了，就到图书馆借书，开始要做chi lit proj了！很想快点完成！目标：by 这个礼拜天！
今天的补习也临时取消，因为马来人要过年嘛。。也好，可以回家休息！
最近心情也比较好一点了。谢谢大家一直支持着我。。
早早到printing lab去print‘to zanarkand'的乐谱、lecture notes等。。上了jap lecture，作了lecture quiz，就和HJ, al跑出来，去lab，然后再和HJ去吃东西。。很喜欢跟HJ在一起，怀念那段year one sem 1到现在的感觉。那时只有我们两个人，不是很熟、但是很click，也很demure。。sem 2，和HJ单独的时间比较少，总是和kel一起，很多搞笑、发疯的回忆。时常加上al,我们四个在一起，一在一起，就是笑不停。kel总是弄HJ笑，我随时参一脚，al就会在一旁很冷静，说‘一点都不好笑！’year2 sem1,和HJ在一起的时间虽然比较少，但我们还是一样，一在一起就无话不谈。和al在一起时，也发现他变得很多话了，什么事都可以讲。
我也发现，和朋友深交，会渐渐忽略了浅交的朋友。得一样、失一样。最后，还是要靠双方面。有缘分成为朋友，也得有努力维持啊。。
吃完了，就到图书馆借书，开始要做chi lit proj了！很想快点完成！目标：by 这个礼拜天！
今天的补习也临时取消，因为马来人要过年嘛。。也好，可以回家休息！
最近心情也比较好一点了。谢谢大家一直支持着我。。
14 October 2007
sunday break
I was so slack this weekend. Had not been doing any revision except finalizing the last bits of my two due-y assignments..really felt so much better when i knew these two loads are going to be off my head..
*phew*
so was slacking my days off, and i was learning this 'to zanarkand' piece.. on my own again.. haha.. felt so thrilled to hear it coming out from my playing.. still learning~!
met up with pam this morning, and we went to PS, to catch 'ratatouille'. haha, it's like so long alr rite? but it's really a very very very nice and funny movie with brilliant graphics! i gave it 5 stars actually, nth that i dun like about. haha..
After that, went to shop a bit here n there, den went home, dead beat again. but, i really love this feeling of relaxing.. n spending time with your fav frens..
5 more weeks to go, and this sem is over.. hmm...
*phew*
so was slacking my days off, and i was learning this 'to zanarkand' piece.. on my own again.. haha.. felt so thrilled to hear it coming out from my playing.. still learning~!
met up with pam this morning, and we went to PS, to catch 'ratatouille'. haha, it's like so long alr rite? but it's really a very very very nice and funny movie with brilliant graphics! i gave it 5 stars actually, nth that i dun like about. haha..
After that, went to shop a bit here n there, den went home, dead beat again. but, i really love this feeling of relaxing.. n spending time with your fav frens..
5 more weeks to go, and this sem is over.. hmm...
13 October 2007
Something New
Thur, after accompanying hj in school for lunch, met up with pam at cck lot one, coz we're going to buy the tix to catch 新加坡金曲奖2007. so we went n got 5 tix. at least something to look forward to at 27th oct!
shopped around n i had a very strong urge to cut my hair, cos it's a heavy helmet i wore everyday and i wanted a change. not short, but a style-able hair.. so went to kimage.. n if u go to kimage, u expect somethin havoc out of it.
so now my hair, looks smth like this:
*pic shows the best it can be, under the best settings, weather etc~
the front view..
and the side view..
again, i repeat, imagine a hair like this, only on the best hair day. LOL.
so, it rocks huh.
wore this hair to sch on fri, n i think it's havoc, coz when i asked al, huM and el if it's havoc, they "hahaha.." XD al asked why not cut shorter, why he always wan me short hair? wouldn't dat be more havoc?? den el asked me why dun spike my hair.. wa... i cant imagine..
Anw, bad weather these days, everyone is sick.. hj stil not fully recovered from her fevers n migraines, hy's eye infection oso haven recover, al oso 'dead' from flu yesterday, hmm .. so stress n so tired, sure very easy to meet Mr.Sick. hope everyone get well soon!
Anw, i am so boliao, i took this 2 pics in geo lect. seen anything weird??
Got it??
They all wore black! XD
shopped around n i had a very strong urge to cut my hair, cos it's a heavy helmet i wore everyday and i wanted a change. not short, but a style-able hair.. so went to kimage.. n if u go to kimage, u expect somethin havoc out of it.
so now my hair, looks smth like this:
*pic shows the best it can be, under the best settings, weather etc~
the front view..
and the side view..
again, i repeat, imagine a hair like this, only on the best hair day. LOL.
so, it rocks huh.
wore this hair to sch on fri, n i think it's havoc, coz when i asked al, huM and el if it's havoc, they "hahaha.." XD al asked why not cut shorter, why he always wan me short hair? wouldn't dat be more havoc?? den el asked me why dun spike my hair.. wa... i cant imagine..
Anw, bad weather these days, everyone is sick.. hj stil not fully recovered from her fevers n migraines, hy's eye infection oso haven recover, al oso 'dead' from flu yesterday, hmm .. so stress n so tired, sure very easy to meet Mr.Sick. hope everyone get well soon!
Anw, i am so boliao, i took this 2 pics in geo lect. seen anything weird??
Got it??
They all wore black! XD
学校的事
Looking back at the deadlines list i posted on 28th sep, which is about 2 weeks ago, i realised now..
1)Translation PPT submission on 1st Oct (mon) already presented
2)Chi lexi loan words research chart on 30 sept (sun) even the analysis is 99% completed n due for submission this sunday
3)Geo Interview and survey qns to be ready on 1st Oct (mon) completed
4)Geo Essay First part of the first draft on 2nd Oct (tues) everything is done, except cutting word count
5)Jap Mid term test on 1st Oct (mon) done
6)Jap Project Pamphlet on 2nd Oct (tues) submitted
7)Jap Homework, including: KP sheet, VQ32, PP2(R), PP3(W), HM32 by 2nd Oct (tues) not yet completed for coming week's
8)Chi lit mid term test on 4th oct (thurs) done
9)Translation 7th lect assignment on 2nd oct (tues) going to lecture 9
10)chi lit individual term paper on 5th Nov ==> 0% (haven even decide wat to write)
i am still due for number 10. ok i really should sit down n start to decide what i want to write about. at least i have some lil' time now.
I really hope my blue days can be over. anw, told hj a very very blunt truth few days ago. i noe it is very hurting for her and i am sorry i told her/never told her about it. for a moment, i blamed myself for the suspect of 挑拨离间。no matter good or bad, really should not talk bad stuffs about friends. maybe i should be act blur, and tot the world is a wonderful place where everyone are friends, so i wouldn't hurt anyone, and i wouldn't make things worse. it's a fact but when these happens between frens, i really duno what i can do about it. i really hate him for being a snake head and faking a mask in front of us so often. i caught him lying so many times, or maybe i assumed he's lying coz i did not have the trust in him anymore. but, our friendship is broken enough, i hope it's enough.
i just think: if we're not friends, please stop acting friendly with us. if you don't like us, please dun act like you like us. no one forces you to stay. i really don't understand why he always give a face that he's uncomfortable with us, but still chooses to be with us, and looks moody.
Maybe girls can get too emo over such matters. and i am so sorry and childish to be 'backstabbing'. i will never mention these again. these are already bad enough. even if i tok about it, nothing can be solved. and that's making everyone unhappy.
也许装作什么都不知道会好一点吧。
10)chi lit individual term paper on 5th Nov ==> 0% (haven even decide wat to write)
i am still due for number 10. ok i really should sit down n start to decide what i want to write about. at least i have some lil' time now.
I really hope my blue days can be over. anw, told hj a very very blunt truth few days ago. i noe it is very hurting for her and i am sorry i told her/never told her about it. for a moment, i blamed myself for the suspect of 挑拨离间。no matter good or bad, really should not talk bad stuffs about friends. maybe i should be act blur, and tot the world is a wonderful place where everyone are friends, so i wouldn't hurt anyone, and i wouldn't make things worse. it's a fact but when these happens between frens, i really duno what i can do about it. i really hate him for being a snake head and faking a mask in front of us so often. i caught him lying so many times, or maybe i assumed he's lying coz i did not have the trust in him anymore. but, our friendship is broken enough, i hope it's enough.
i just think: if we're not friends, please stop acting friendly with us. if you don't like us, please dun act like you like us. no one forces you to stay. i really don't understand why he always give a face that he's uncomfortable with us, but still chooses to be with us, and looks moody.
Maybe girls can get too emo over such matters. and i am so sorry and childish to be 'backstabbing'. i will never mention these again. these are already bad enough. even if i tok about it, nothing can be solved. and that's making everyone unhappy.
也许装作什么都不知道会好一点吧。
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